I had an awkward relationship with someone at work. There were trust issues. things were not moving. There were blame games. One day I just told the person “You know we don’t work in a government job right? We don’t have to work together if we don’t enjoy it. Who knows we might not even be in the same company next year. I know I can be blunt sometimes, but you will never have to second guess me. And till we are together I will have your back.”
This was all it took. Things did not become perfect, but it became a lot easier to work together. At least for me. Not sure if the person still hates me inside.
Learning: All problems are interpersonal problems.
Book recommendation: Courage to be disliked.
I know this is like a cringy Linkedin story. But I am honestly not making this up. If you know me this is exactly the kind of stuff I say to someone. I have never been politically correct.
Also someone told me once when I was attempting to be more politically correct in my life, “I don’t want that shit. Be the asshole who gives me the truth.”